


Feels just right

by basiltonn



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: M/M, Marriage Proposal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-12
Updated: 2017-08-12
Packaged: 2018-12-14 12:05:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11782806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/basiltonn/pseuds/basiltonn
Summary: A proposal fic because why the fuck not





	Feels just right

**Author's Note:**

> don't ask why I'm posting this, I don't know either

Ronan Lynch sat in the backseat of his BMW, chewing on the bands wrapped around his wrists. He stared straight ahead, past the driver’s seat, past the windshield. He was thinking, thinking, thinking. About his friends, his boyfriend. Fuck. That boyfriend of his. He was technically the cause of this existential crisis going down while leaning against $4000 leather. He closed his eyes, careful not to drift off. He thought of Adam and rubbed the pad of his thumb over the small object that hadn’t left his pocket in three days. Three days ago he had dreamt it up. That was all it had been. It felt like years. Burning questions in his mind, tearing him apart. Did he want this? Did Adam? What would happen to them? To the friend group? But he was in love. God. He was so in love. But everything about this terrified him. He stared down at his palms which were dusted with dirt and blood. He hated this whole game of would he/wouldn’t he. He should have just tossed the infernal object into a field and have been done with it. But that wouldn’t work. It wouldn’t stop the want. But he didn’t want to stop the want. Being in love was beautiful. He sighed and stared up at the sun, hovering on the horizon. He thought about Adam. Of course, he did.

Ronan Lynch sat perched on the kitchen table in Monmouth. He dug his teeth into an apple, juice fizzing down his chin. Gansey sat on the ground, adjusting the henrietta model that he had perfected long ago. He was taping fallen sides and fraying corners when Ronan got up to toss away his apple core. The boy slipped his hands in his pockets after the disposal of the apple, and glanced down at Gansey,  
“I think I’m going to ask Adam to marry me,” he said plainly. A brief pause circled the room before the simple response,  
“Oh?” Ronan flashed a sad grin,  
“Yeah… I just. Seems right.” He stared at the floorboards. Gansey wasn’t used to bashful, quiet Ronan,  
“Well,” Gansey sat up on his knees and cleared his throat, “If you think you’re ready. If you love him. Do you love him?” Gansey watched Ronan’s face turn scarlet,  
“No Dick. I want to spend the rest of my life with this guy I like just okay. In fact, I don’t even like him. He’s just amazing in bed.” Ronan crossed his arms and rolled his eyes,  
“Sorry. I didn’t mean it like that,” Gansey said, unsure of what he’d said wrong. “I just… never mind. You think you’re really going to?” Ronan nodded,  
“I dreamt a ring… a few nights ago. It just feels right. I want to do it soon. But-” Ronan paused, unsure how he could say the next few words. Gansey didn’t speak, so he was forced to continue. Gansey watched him with wondering eyes behind his wireframes. Ronan took his eyes away from the floor and looked at Gansey, “I want you to be there. And Henry. And Sargent. I think that… it would be better that way.” Gansey nodded,  
“How are you going to do it?” He was afraid to get excited yet. He knew it would bother Ronan, and he wasn’t sure if this would all follow through. He wanted it to, those boys deserved love more than anyone. But Gansey was a worrier. He worried that marriage would ruin what the had. But no. They were in love. Anyone could see it, really. Ronan looked off to the side of the room before answering his friend,   
“I don’t really know. I was thinking where Cabeswater used to be. I thought that might be nice,” Gansey nodded. Each of the boys stared at their respective walls. 

For a while, it was left at that. They did not speak about it any longer. And then Gansey asked if he could tell Blue. He was told he could. Blue asked to tell Henry. She did. And then everyone knew but Adam. Blue kept wiggling her eyebrows when the five of them went out together and Adam and Ronan would sit or stand close to one another. Henry would grin every time they kissed. Ronan drew the line when Gansey started telling Adam how lucky he was. He didn’t want to wait around anymore. He wanted to do it soon. He wanted to do it now. 

It was a Thursday night when he started to figure out the logistics. He and Adam were lying together, shirtless. Adam was asleep, Ronan’s mouth was sore. He thought about Adam, like usual. He thought about the ring. About Cabeswater. He thought about being married. It filled him with a thrill. 

Over the next week, he worked out what he would do. He would go for drives for hours, stumbling below the speed limit, thinking. He thought about lacing the trees with lights. Making the forest come alive, transforming it into the place where they fell in love all those years ago. Fell in love… slowly but surely. His mind would wander to a million ideas. Some magical, others hilarious. Some sad, some beautiful. It wasn’t until he drove up to the forest one night. The clock on the dash blinked 3:27 am. Ronan watched the green neon lights. He let out a long held breath when the 7 switched to an 8. He pulled open the car door. He left the engine running and didn’t bother locking the doors. He walked through the sporadic forest, waiting for the magic that would never come. If Blue was here, she would tell him that all trees were magical. He would tell her to stop being such a fucking romantic. Ronan ran a hand over his buzzed head. He looked at the forest around him. He nodded at the landscape around him and smiled. He nodded again and turned back to the car. 

It was a Sunday when it happened. Ronan picked up Adam after his shift. The other boy slung himself into the passenger seat and laced his fingers between his boyfriend’s. The aforementioned boyfriend’s palms were sweating. His lips trembled when they kissed,  
“Alright?” Adam asked softly. Ronan nodded,  
“I love you,” he muttered. Adam smiled and pressed his mouth against the boy’s,  
“I love you too,” this seemed good enough for Ronan. He smiled and started up the car again. Adam smiled and leaned against the window,  
“How was work?” Ronan asked, gazing out at the road. Adam was surprised by the simple question. He expected something more… vulgar to come out of Ronan’s mouth. But he decided to appreciate it,  
“It was all right. Just work. I don’t really want to talk about it.” Ronan nodded. On Sundays, the two boys liked to drive up to the barns and sleep. Adam worked a shift that ended at nine, so they liked to just go home and lie together. Maybe shirtless. Maybe with their mouths against the other’s. But however they did it, Sundays were their peaceful nights. This Sunday would not be quite as peaceful.  
“You took the wrong turn,” Adam said, sitting up,  
“Hmm?”  
“You took the wrong turn. You went left when you were meant to go right- back there.”  
“I know Parrish. Do I look like a fucking idiot to you?” There was the Ronan Adam knew. Adam grinned,  
“Where are we going then?”  
“Cabeswater.”  
“What? Why?”  
“Because. No more questions.”  
“You can’t just tell me we’re going to Cabeswater and expect me to not question your reasoning.”  
“How many times have I told you to never question my reasoning, Parrish?” Adam sighed and leaned back in his seat. Thoughts rushed through Ronan’s mind. A mixture of he knows and just tell him. Just do it right here. But he was able to ignore the intrusive thoughts for a while. Just long enough to get them to Cabeswater. Long enough for Ronan to watch Adam look at their friends, all huddled in the back of the pig, the October wind biting at their skin,  
“Ronan, what’s going on? What’s this about?” Ronan suddenly felt terrified. He looked at Adam. His blue eyes pulsated against Ronan’s pupils. They were etched with shades of concern, terror, and hidden somewhere lay hope. Desire. In Ronan’s eyes lay fulfillment. Anxiety and care. He wondered if he could do this. He closed his eyes and waited a moment before opening them,   
“Adam…” his voice shook on the two simple syllables, “I- fuck…”  
“Ronan, what’s going on?” He glanced at his friends sitting in the car. Gansey was not so subtly recording on his cell phone, arm wrapped around Blue. Henry was squished up against the other two, grinning,  
“I knew it was a bad idea asking those three to come… fuck. Okay… Adam. I’m- I’m in love with you, like really in love with you. Like it’s kind of gross… but I just… I can’t imagine not being with you and not being in love with you and…” he fumbled, trying to pull the ring out of his pocket. A bronze band with a raven on it. He had dreamt up multiple boxes and bags, but he hadn’t found any he liked. So he didn’t put it in anything. He sighed lowered himself onto the ground,  
“I guess I’m just trying to say… will you marry me?” Adam took a step closer to the boy,  
“Really?”  
“Yes really, asshole,” Ronan was trying desperately not to cry. He hadn’t cried in a long time. Adam looked down at Ronan and dropped down next to him. He nodded and leaned into Ronan, “Yes.” Ronan pressed his mouth against the other boy’s and ran his hand through his hair, pulling his fingers through any stranded knots,  
“I love you,” Adam muttered. Behind them, Blue stood,  
“Alright,” she half shouted, “get a room,” Adam’s face burned crimson and he stared at the forest floor.  
“Nicely done,” Gansey said, grinning.  
Adam turned away from the group then and stepped closer to the BMW, leaning against the hood. He slipped the ring onto his finger. A perfect fit. Of course. He smiled at the ground, trying not to cry. He was not successful. He instead focused on trying not to wail. He instead sobbed. His thick tears turned into hiccups and then Ronan approached him,  
“Hey,” he brushed away Adam’s tears, “I sent those losers home. I’m sorry I brought them. I thought it might be nice,” Adam shook his head.  
“It was nice. Thank you.”  
“Anytime,” Ronan said, laughing. Adam smiled a sad smile,  
“I never thought I would get married. I never thought I would want to. My parents didn’t have the greatest relationship… he hit her too, you know?”  
“Stop,” Ronan said sternly, “don’t talk about them. Don’t think about them. Okay? Are you listening to me? You have me. Alright? I’m not going to be like that fucker. Okay? I love you. I’m going to keep you safe-”  
“I know. Ronan. I know… but. I want to invite my mom. When we… get married. I think she’d like to be there.”  
“She doesn’t deserve to be there.”  
“It’s not her fault. She was- she is sick, Ronan. She’s scared. I want her to be there,” Ronan looked at the ground and nodded,  
“Okay. If you want that.”  
“I do.”  
“Okay. Good,” They looked at one another for a moment longer and then pulled themselves into the front seats of the BMW and drove to The Barns.


End file.
